5 Ways to Strengthen Your Personal Community in Reno
Doug Erwin from EDAWN’s Entrepreneurship team once said that “we are creating an ecosystem of givers instead of takers in Reno.” That has really stuck with me since Renoites seem to intuitively understand that we are all in this together, and that the success of one person has benefits for the whole community. In my post Why Personal Communities can be More Difficult that Professional Networks, I talked about some of the challenges of growing a personal community. So with Reno’s positive tendencies in mind, I want to list my top 5 ways to strengthen a personal community in Reno specifically.
1. Strengthen your close relationships
General recommendation to start- close friends and family are your most important community. Shamelessly pour your energy into them and continuously strengthen your connection with the people you care about deeply. Dunbar’s numbers puts loose guidelines on how many relationships we can maintain and says that, roughly, there is space for 5 intimate relationships, 15 good relationships, 50 close ones, and 150 total relationships. The takeaway is to be conscious of who your 5 intimates and 15 goodies are and give them priority when things get tough.
2. Put yourself out there on social media
I’m not saying to narrate every moment of your life, but put yourself out there. Putting your personality, thoughts, and opinions on social media sites makes you vulnerable to your Reno community. Before someone meets you in person, maybe they already know that you are passionate about helping underrepresented youth and have similar passions with supporting working families. Being vulnerable publicly is TERRIFYING! But if you want to grow your community, you need to be the first to extend the olive branch. Show those that you interact with that you are willing to trust.
3. Offer your expertise and time to causes you care about
Everyone is an expert at something and usually it’s something they are passionate about because… why else would they be an expert? If there is something you are great at, leverage that to offer your services to a cause you care about in your community. For example, I volunteered to sit on the judging panel for a hackathon given my knowledge and experience with engineering as well as startups. Time and expertise is more valuable that simply donating money if your goal is to grow your personal community. To build your community, you need to be present.
4. Learn to say no
Every community-building social engagement takes energy, but generally it is happy energy that feeds right back into your life in a positive way. Not in the way of favors, but from the intangibles that come from strengthening relationships with people you care about. Strengthening relationships with people we care about increases our feeling of connectedness which has proven positive effects on health. However maybe there is someone in your life you feel you “have to” spend time with for an number of reasons: you’ve known them for a long time, they are a friend of the family, they are a coworker, etc. Learning how to politely decline spending time with people that don’t have a positive effect on you is a challenging but very useful skill. This isn’t to say that relationships should be all rainbows and unicorns, but if you constantly leave engagements feeling worse about yourself, your friends, your work, your hobbies – learn how to politely say no to that person.
5. Give more than you take
This is the big-ticket item. With your personal community, you should always be in a mindset of giving more than you take. This is because with a truly strong personal community, you’ll find that your community will give you far more than you’ll ever be able to give back. I can’t speak to other cities, but in Reno I’ve found this mindset to be true from my closest friends to acquaintances I’ve met but once. Renoites are always willing to extend a hand, make an introduction, or offer feedback with the implicit understanding that the receiver would not hesitate to do the same. The give more than you take mindset overlaps with leadership principles too which makes perfect sense; leaders are exceptional at creating communities around themselves. Use that same mindset in your own personal community.
Obviously I love Reno and the people that live here. Everyone calls their hometown special, but I’ve found kinship with others who truly would not want to live anywhere else because of the culture and community their town offers. Reaching out to my fellow Renoites, what do you think? Is Reno really as welcoming as I make it out to be? Do you find that it is easy to build your community here? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments or in person! Find me on Twitter @crystalvharvey or on LinkedIn.
- Are you a Leader or a Supervisor? - May 3, 2019
- Why Reno Offices Love Dogs - May 2, 2019
- 5 Ways to Strengthen Your Personal Community in Reno - May 1, 2019